Thursday, September 29, 2011

My Four-Legged Kid

I have a four-legged kid named Church. I named him after the cat in Stephen King’s book Pet Semtary.
 
 



This is Church. He’s a handsome boy. Don’t you think?

He’s the coolest cat ever, but lately he’s been a pain-in-the-ass. He wants either in or outside. Or he wants to go in the basement. He can’t make up his frickin’ mind. He’ll come in for a few minutes, and then he wants to go back outside. He’ll go outside for a few minutes, and then he wants back in. And he meows, and meows, and meows. However, he gets away with it because he does stuff like this.
 


He’s just too damn cute to stay mad at, and he likes to snuggle. Also, when he’s not complaining or whining, he has a cute disposition. And he’s funny. He gets big points for silliness. But he does get in his moods, and sometimes when I’m writing, he won’t stop interrupting me. Again, he’ll meow and meow and meow, or he’ll scratch at the carpet, which he knows not to do, or he’ll attack my arm. So then I’ll threaten him. I tell him if he continues with his crap, his ass is staying outside. Amazingly enough, he chills out and goes to sleep. I think I’m going to have to do that this morning because as I’m writing this, he’s banging the cupboard door in the kitchen. He likes to go in the cupboards. But see, I’m trying to write, and he’s being a brat. Now, he’s meowing. It’s a pathetic meow, like he has it SO hard. Poor baby. Kevin is making crying sounds (LOL), telling Church he’s a wuss.

Kids. It doesn’t matter if they’re human or furry, we choose to share our life with them. And even though sometimes they’re a pain-in-the-ass; we still love them.

Now, I need to go kick some kitty ass because he’s attacking my leg.

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